striped shirts

gigolo! ha sucka!

2008-08-20T16:49:00.004-04:00

guess who used to live in my neighborhood? neneh cherry! oddly enough, i found this fact out from a comment on a long island city website, and now i have confirmation from this 1989 article from the new york times.

i was relaying this most exciting news to darkpony this morning, and i said, "it's weird that she lived here since she is british." (note: british people are allowed to live in long island city.) darkpony politely pointed out that neneh cherry is not british but just uses a cockney accent in the middle of "the buffalo stance."

"what is he like? what is he like, anyway?"

ha ha. oops. here's the video!

i heart b_ _ bies!

2008-08-19T00:13:00.005-04:00

this post was originally going to be a rant about those rubber bracelets like the lance armstrong "livestrong" bracelet and how i'm not such a fan of those, especially after i saw some woman wearing three bracelets that said, "i heart boobies," on them.
anyway, the funny part of this story is that i was showing darkpony something on my computer when he suddenly became distracted. well, you know that little google search box that is up by the browser window? mine had a search for "i heart boobies bracelet," but i think darkpony only saw the "i heart boobies" part. i tried to explain to him that i was looking this up because i saw this woman on the subway, and i wanted to see if this was an actual bracelet that was related to fighting breast cancer blah blah blah...but he was not buying it. oh well. busted!

holy bejeezus!

2008-08-14T20:16:00.003-04:00

here i am just trying to enjoy a night of watching the olympics, and then a commercial for lipstick jungle comes on. as i briefly look up from my laptop, i catch a glimpse of someone who i think is mary tyler moore, yet her face is melting and her eyes are missing. seriously, facelifts ain't right, kids!

what else have i been up to?

2008-08-14T16:17:00.003-04:00

not much. i was in san francisco last week and discovered that it is only the 15th most populous city in the united states. i know! right? mind is blown. who knew? it's the second most densely populated city, so that's why i was fooled i guess. though i did keep seeing the same people...

oh, my chair finally arrived. ray! now it's covered in sticky paws to keep them little rascals from scratching it.

finally, i totally rammed my knee into this marble thing that is part of our bathtub. yowsers! that hurt and i had quite a bruise for a while.

yep. that's all i've got for you.

and she's back...perhaps

2008-08-14T16:06:00.004-04:00

obviously i've been doing something totally awesome all summer which is why i haven't been posting. let's pretend like i was at some artists' colony rather than sitting in my officle doing nothing. boo hoo.

anyway, i'm back because we have an important issue to discuss: the olympics. more specifically, swimming. and really specifically, goggles. has anyone else noticed that everything about swimming- the suits, the pool, the lane lines, etc.- have made technological advances over the years, but the goggles- and swim caps for that matter- are pretty much the same as when i was last on a swim team some twenty-three years ago? i believe that the goggle industry is as corrupt as the oil industry. for reals!

by the sound of it...

2008-05-28T11:24:00.002-04:00

i think alec baldwin was the conductor on my e train this morning!

what's the point?

2008-05-14T14:36:00.003-04:00

i was just managing some of my google reader blogs and saw one that hadn't had an update in a while. so i went to the actual site, and it said, "you have to be invited to read this blog." this was a blog i enjoyed reading, but i'm not going to grovel to the author to ask if i can be invited to read her blog. blah X. the internet is for the people!

ughs!

2008-05-14T11:31:00.003-04:00

thanks to the cooperation of my parents, the reality of buying my chair has been made possible. good thing i stopped by crate and barrel yesterday because the damn thing is more popular than originally thought. i had to backorder it! i really thought that no one would want it, and i would end up buying it at a bargain price. my instincts were wrong. per usual.

watch out, tina fey

2008-05-02T11:47:00.002-04:00

today, darkpony commented that i was dressed like a journalist (from the seventies, i might add). anyway, it's a good look, and one i may embrace. in response to his comment, i flaunted my mad improve skillz for dp. here's how it went down:

me (pretending to be a journalist): let's go into the city and talk to that guy.

pretty good! i should be in the most advanced class of second city with these skillz. with a z.

a-hole of the day

2008-04-27T11:59:00.005-04:00

so i've had to stop reading blogs about all of the luxury condo development in nyc because it was just bringing me down, but today, the new york times has this article about hotels being built in the dutch kills section of queens. this neighborhood is just north of the neighborhood where i live. anyway, i really love this quote from one of the developers:

Steven Bahar, one of the developers, said critics should consider the alternative to such construction. “If we don’t build in New York and the areas that are close to mass transit,” he said, “where are the city planners supposed to put development? In the suburbs, where people use cars and destroy the environment?”

how thoughtful you are, steven bahar. a-hole!

darkpony is on boingboing!

2008-04-24T12:44:00.001-04:00

well his picture is! first he was on boingboing gadgets. then he was on regular boingboing. good job, darkpony!

i tumblr for ya

2008-04-16T16:17:00.003-04:00

instead of having darkpony set me up with my own website, he decided that tumblr would be a good option for me. and, of course, he was right. tumblr's super easy to use. it's also what all of the cool bloggers are using. adios, blogger. arrivederci, wordpress. you can choose your own color schemes and the templates are sleek yet very simple. so here's my sewing blog called "since 1974." i don't think that title really has anything to do with sewing, but i don't care. i will post my first video post when i go home tonight. first i have to get through this work day. tick tock. stay tuned!

darkpony's new, political website

2008-04-15T23:56:00.000-04:00

check it out here!

cops kill cougar on north side

2008-04-15T23:37:00.004-04:00

gosh, it really sucks to be an older, sexy woman on the prowl these days. just let us ladies grow old gracefully already. sheesh! here are some highlights from this chicago tribune article:

A cougar ran loose in Chicago on Monday for the first time since the city's founding in the 19th Century..."It was turning on the officers," Ryan said...It's unclear how a cougar could have traveled south into Chicago from Wilmette, but the areas are connected by a Metra train route..."I walked to the window and saw a cougar," Dorazio said. "It was the freakiest thing I ever saw."...He knew it was a cougar because he had seen it on the Discovery Channel, he said.

my new blog. maybe.

2008-04-11T13:05:00.002-04:00

i think i'm going to start a sewing blog. i have a new work space, so i plan to do more sewing. i even have an idea for a new project. we will see. i'm also thinking of making it a video blog since i got this new cool camera. thanks, adobe! i wouldn't be on screen, but my projects would be with audio commentary by yours truly. we will see. i was also thinking of calling it, "girl's sew crazy!" but darkpony thought that was dumb. boo hoo.

i'll give you a dollar

2008-04-10T16:33:00.002-04:00

if you can guess what current event this poem, written by a drunken fool i know, is referencing.

if oprah says it's okay to be overweight...

2008-04-10T16:29:00.005-04:00

then show me the way to the nearest all-you-can-eat buffet! pronto. so this is how you get america to love you and become a billionaire. your secret is mine, oprah. ha ha ha ha ha...

uh oh! the cat videos are coming...

2008-04-10T12:24:00.002-04:00

darkpony was at an industry party* last night and got some "swag." (i hate that word!) anyway, he got a flip video camera which is the same size or even smaller than a digital camera. it's pretty cool and super easy to use. i love it. i can't wait to post my first cat video. that pony p. is a total hambone for the camera, except that i need to do something about his lazy eye...

*i would like to thank adobe for sponsoring this blog post. i heart adobe!

he just ain't right

2008-04-09T23:00:00.003-04:00

i'm talking about my cat, pony p. that's my current view of him whilst sitting at my computer. freakshow! and i know you're jealous of my emac. rightfully so.

blah X

2008-04-08T13:43:00.004-04:00

i'm in a bit of a funk. i don't know if it's the weather, but i haven't been sleeping well, am not too happy with the day job, and am just feeling blah in general. i definitely need a vacation and have one planned in less than two weeks. i'm going to san francisco. ray! i like that city. there's like no traffic there (unless you're crossing the bridges). it's amazing. i'm also looking forward to sleeping in a nice, big bed in a fancy hotel on nob hill. thanks, fab!

it's really getting out of hand...

2008-03-26T11:38:00.002-04:00

my obsession with gnomes, that is. i came across this gnome bonnet via this blog called {frolic!}. i don't know where i would sport such a bonnet, but it sure is cute.

score!

2008-03-25T21:40:00.006-04:00

someone in my apartment building was getting rid of some record albums from the 70s and 80s (mostly 80s), and i scored. big time. some other tenant saw the pile a little too late and tried to make fun of me for also taking a styx record among all of the other gems. whatevs! jealous much?

me want

2008-03-25T16:12:00.006-04:00

we have some newfound space in our living room, and i want this chair. now. of course, i'm not going to pay full price for it because it's ugly. am i right? i mean it fits my granny style, but i can't imagine other people wanting this chair. at least i hope that's the case. also, i can't pay that price for something the cats, actually rabbit roo, are going to scratch the you-know-what out of. anyone have any good cat scratching prevention tips besides declawing the little guy? he looks like such an angel but...actually this just gives me an excuse to post a cute picture of him. we might have the cutest cats. for real. did i mention that they got their teeth cleaned recently? now their breath is minty fresh. not really.

breathing a sigh of relief. aah!

2008-03-25T11:22:00.006-04:00

last week i got a haircut which i felt to be a little too edgy even for me, and i've had a lot of crazy haircuts. actually, i was feeling like i looked like hitler sans mustache obvs. anyway, my biggest concern about my fresh cut was what my coffee cart lady would say because i've had trouble with her in the past on this topic. i even contemplated avoiding her cart. well, the first day she only said, "you got your hair cut." then she didn't say anything about my hair for the next few days. but today, she said, "this time i like your haircut." ray! life is good!

almost human

2008-03-23T12:06:00.004-04:00

rabbit roo resting his head on a pillow. he's soooo cute. happy easter!

perfect for kids

2008-03-21T12:02:00.004-04:00

the other night darkpony and i were finishing the design for a jacket of a kid's book for our other project, and here is a snippet of our conversation:

dp: don't get mad...i like this font, but it looks like the one used for penthouse forum in the '70s.

hd: what do you expect? it's called soul papa. oh well. it works!

people who annoy me today

2008-03-18T11:32:00.001-04:00

that guy drinking chili this morning on the subway. oh yuck! and then he would proceed to suck his teeth after each sip. double yuck!

nepotism at its finest

2008-03-17T16:14:00.004-04:00

i ended up buying this marimekko coat. anyway, i decided to google the designer whose name is on the tag: alicia rosauer. well, it turns out that she is married to the son of the founders of crate & barrel, and they went to work for marimekko in 1999. i wonder how they got that gig? must have been the combination of hard work and luck and nothing to do with the fact that crate & barrel has been selling marimekko products for years. oh, and they are new trier high school sweethearts. gag! so this has obviously soured my purchase. i mean i like the coat, and she made a very nice design, but still...and darkpony has, unfortunately, pointed out that the pink flower on the left breast of the coat has a red center which happens to fit exactly where my nipple is. great! now, i'm completely self-concious of this. ughs!

i've learned my lesson

2008-03-17T15:12:00.006-04:00

on saturday, darkpony and i were out and about in our neighborhood when we came across a shelving unit someone was giving away for free. we decided to pick it up and take the subway home because dp was doing some heavy lifting. when we were crossing the street, against the light, to get to the subway entrance, this silver mercedes almost runs me over. i know we were crossing against the light, but dp was carrying this heavy shelving unit, so cut us some slack, right? well, i decide to flip the guy in the car the bird. he starts yelling at dp who is behind me, and then i see him park his car. at this point we are going down into the subway, and ten seconds later this madman comes running down the stairs yelling, and then he kicks the shelving unit that is between him and dp. he keeps emphasizing how polite he was to let us cross the street, and says something like, "your wife give me the finger! she stick that finger up your butt?" ha ha! then he says to dp, "i'm going to kill you! i'm going to break your glasses!" not sure if these things were going to happen in this order, but it would be funny if they did. the whole time i'm cowering behind dp, threatening to call the police. i had my cell phone out, though it was most likely i wouldn't have gotten a signal. also, there were other people around including the mta guy in the booth. he also wasn't sure if he should call the police or not. finally this madman starts ascending the stairs when i decide it's a good idea to get in a few more verbal taunts. fortunately, he didn't turn back around and really kill dp/break his glasses. i think he was with the russian mafia or something and was wearing a mercedes jacket to match his car. yikes! dp was kind of silent after that. i've now learned my lesson about flipping people the bird. that's for sure. though i'm convinced that he wouldn't have gone after me if i had been alone...really, i've learned my lesson!

gnome photo shoot

2008-03-13T11:31:00.002-04:00

i finally got these gnomes from my most generous mother. she said that i deserved them because i'm such a great daughter! it's true. i am. so i decided to do a gnome photo shoot with some marimekko fabric i had on hand. too cute to boot!

parker stevenson can't lose (i stole this title from dp!)

2008-03-12T15:30:00.006-04:00

the other day, darkpony and i were eating brunch at this southern style restaurant in hells kitchen (though dp thought it was related to colorado somehow), and there was this painting on the wall of parker stevenson. i thought this would be a great companion to this painting of brooke shields. anyway, i don't think it's supposed to be parker stevenson because the other painting on the wall, which looked to be by the same artist, showed some sort of mardi gras scene. the photo is a bit blurry, but you can still see the resemblance, right? hardy boys!

are you finnished, yet?

2008-03-05T21:55:00.008-05:00

so i'm having a love affair with finland at the moment. i came across something the other day, which i can't yet talk about here or all will be jinxed, but it has fueled my interest in all things finnish. check out this half-finnish artist, sanna annukka. her stuff is amazing. i love it.

then, there is marimekko, a finnish classic. i went to the marimekko store today, but it was kind of blah. cb2 of all places has this really great marimekko wall hanging for sale.

finally, i hit up a bunch of designer re-sale shops on the upper east side today and came across this marimekko coat. i promise you that i will never again post a picture of myself here, but it goes with my finnish theme. anyway, this coat is a bit loud, but i've been wanting a quilted coat . unfortunately, this was $200 on sale. sigh. anyway, i'm totally trying to convince myself that i look like a crazed gnome in this, and that i don't want or need this coat. it's not working!

oops, i did it again!

2008-03-03T12:25:00.006-05:00

last night darkpony was all set to put his tv dinner in the oven when he asks, "did you put a little too much manpower into your cleaning the other day?" having no clue what he was talking about, i went into the kitchen to take a look. oops! i had put the stove and oven knobs in the dishwasher because they were sticky gross, but that took off all of the numbers on the oven knob. how are we supposed to know the oven temperature? dp cooked his meal anyway, but at one point i swear the oven was cranking at 600 degrees. now i have to call and get a replacement part. oy vey!

addendum: so $22.95 later, i will have my part in ten days. sheesh!

just as i suspected

2008-02-29T14:30:00.004-05:00

hrmmm. the "luxury condo" market is faltering in the outer boroughs. i wonder why? read the article here:

The president of W Financial, Gregg Winter, said: "Mediocre projects — uninspired designs thrown up in ho-hum locations — are now justifiably suffering and selling at a pace akin to Chinese water torture. For years these projects would somehow manage to get financed, built, and slide though the system buoyed by a rising tide that caused amateur developers to believe they actually knew what they were doing. Winter 2008 is indeed a time of reckoning; however, my current experience is that the strong, well-designed, and well-located projects are still selling.

In certain projects, developers are contemplating price reductions or conversion to rental. One senior development director told me, "Sales have dried up in Long Island City even for products in the best locations. Since October, we have only sold five units."

Another developer in Williamsburg said sales have fallen by at least 50% in one project, and he is converting his other 12-story development to rentals from condominium. Projects in downtown Brooklyn and Fort Greene are having difficulty attracting purchasers even at prices as low at $550 a square foot.

yeah!

mother knows best

2008-02-28T13:41:00.007-05:00

today i was going to wear a sweater that i used to love. it's only six-months old, but since it is acrylic, it already looks and feels like crap. it's all pilly and yuck. where is this leading you wonder...well, when i was moving into my "alternative" dorm freshman year of college, my random roommate had already moved in but was out of the room. so my mother started rifling through some of her things, including a pile of pastel sweaters. then she uttered those fateful words: "uh oh, hazeldove, these are acrylic!" this obvs meant that my roommate and i would most likely be incompatible, which turned out to be the case. her knuckle cracking habit didn't help things, either.

anyway, back to my acrylic sweater. i actually bought it with my mom last september at tj maxx because i thought the style was really neat and it felt like real wool, maybe even cashmere! i also considered buying a second one in black because that's how i roll. fortunately, my mother talked me out of buying the black one, and now i have a grey one for the goodwill. good thing i paid the maxx for the minimum. am i right?

overheard in my apartment

2008-02-26T11:18:00.002-05:00

hazeldove: hey, i just bought these really cool pants. you'll like them. they're like sci fi with zippers!

darkpony: ummm, i think those are called parachute pants.

hazeldove: but check it out. i can carry a pistol in this pocket after the apocalypse!

darkpony: after the apocalypse? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...

stop. hammertoes. (sung like mc hammer!)

2008-02-22T11:02:00.004-05:00

i was already feeling a little queasy this morning, and then had to stare at two horrific subway ads. first was the jerry orbach "gift of sight" ad, which i've previously mentioned, and the second was for "downtown podiatry" where you can get your bunions and hammertoes, well, hammered out. gross! hello, i don't need to see the before and after pictures, and the after pictures surely aren't much of an improvement. believe you me. those are just some sorry feet, deformities or not. and the foot with the little cocktail weinie toes! geez! this shitzatz should be outlawed in the subway.

ah, the "scud stud"

2008-02-21T14:06:00.007-05:00

remember him from the first gulf war? this little tidbit on pagesix, which i only read for kicks, reminded me of his existence:

THE "scud stud" may fire a legal missile at Mike Nichols and Universal Pictures. Arthur Kent, former NBC News heartthrob, is angry that clips of his Gulf War reports were used in NBC Universal's "Charlie Wilson's War" without acknowledgement. "It was a pretty basic breach of copyright law - brazen, even. And this from one of the corporations that's always moaning on and on about piracy," Kent tells Canadian gossip Shinan Govani. Kent, now a politician in Calgary, isn't too impressed with the Tom Hanks movie, either, calling parts "emphatically false." NBC Universal didn't get back to us.

my mother and i both had a crush on him, and he made the war much more interesting than it actually was. just kidding. anyway during the winter of 1991, i would come home from school, and my mother and i would crank up the kerosene heater in the freezing family room, lie on opposite ends of the couch, eat snacks, watch donohue, and take our afternoon siesta/pass out from the kerosene fumes. when we would come to around 5:30 central and mountain time, the "scud stud" would be on the news. oh yeah! those were the days!

p.s. actually, i feel like there was more round-the-clock war coverage on the major networks because the war had only begun in january of that year. am i right? hmmm.

neat-o!

2008-02-21T13:50:00.006-05:00

thanks to recommendations from google reader based on my subscriptions, i've come across these three fine blogs, which i have now subscribed to. they make me want to get creative and crafty. that is for sure!

"poppytalk," which darkpony thought was called "poopytalk" (ha ha!), is a very nice blog that features home design, crafts, artists, etc.

"fine little day" might be my new super favorite. it is by a woman/designer in sweden who has a great eye for everything.

"fops and dandies" is by a new yorker with great style who photographs her outfits almost daily. this one is bad for me because it feeds my need to shop for clothes. i've been trying to be good about limiting my shopping. trying is the key word!

check this shizatz out, yo!

2008-02-19T17:08:00.002-05:00

my friend "walter faure" has a new blog that i would label as being political, but at the same time i wouldn't limit my description to that. also, darkpony contributes some sci fi news and videogame reviews every once in a blue moon. oh snap! anyhoos check out "poor richard" here. it's also in my blog roll over there to the right. neat!

in other blog friend news, i was worried that "the hag" had given up on blogging forever, but she's back. ray!

finally, here's a blog i came across the other day which i couldn't stop reading. again, it's right up my alley. keep up the good work!

the death and life of new york city laundromats

2008-02-19T13:50:00.005-05:00

this interesting article in the new york times (for once) illustrates the problems that arise when commercial rents skyrocket in certain neighborhoods, forcing necessary businesses, such as laundromats, to close. this has happened in greenwich village, and i remember an acquaintance telling me that she has a great, cheap apartment on madison avenue on the upper east side which she can't give up, but there is nowhere to do laundry. ridiculous!

“It’s the businesses that make a neighborhood a neighborhood that are closing,” said Greg Jackson, president of Mr. Bennett’s block association. “We don’t need any boutiques or fancy bakeries or little cellphone stores. We just don’t need them.”

true dat!

the funny thing is that my neighborhood just gained a much needed second laundromat, which in turn has caused a pricing war with the existing laudromat. oh yeah! 1 quarter used to get me 8 minutes of drying, but now i get 10 minutes. life is good!

people who annoyed me yesterday

2008-02-16T13:02:00.003-05:00

hey girls, could you try to talk just a little bit louder because no one can hear your screeching in this packed subway car. nope. we would all love to be able to hear your most enlightening conversation. really!

boo hoo!

2008-02-16T12:49:00.003-05:00

why do i torture myself by reading the new york times' style section? today, there is an article about how lonely it is in the new multi-million dollar plaza hotel condos because most buyers have multiple homes around the world and only use their condo in new york as a pied-a-terre. here's my favorite line from the article:

The family knew the building was nearly empty, but thought Stan could be like the character Macaulay Culkin played in the movie “Home Alone.”

shut up!

you've got to fight for your right to wear stripes!

2008-02-15T15:15:00.003-05:00

poor kids:

A Swedish preschool has been criticized for banning its children from wearing striped and spotted clothing since the patterns give one of its teachers severe migraine attacks.
The preschool, in Gallivare, 710 miles north of Stockholm, imposed the ban in one of its areas three years ago. But recent complaints from a parent meant the unusual dress code got nationwide attention Thursday.

the adventures of mr. lee!

2008-02-13T15:34:00.004-05:00

i just wrote this post over at working class cats but wanted to share it here. check it out!

my bed buddy

2008-02-10T20:33:00.001-05:00

rabbit roo!

my new boyfriend

2008-02-06T10:21:00.001-05:00

you should meet him. he has his own business; he runs the coffee cart on 14th street and 5th avenue. this morning i orderered a small coffee with two sugars, and he replied, "you don't need any sugar, you are already too sweet." ahhh. i bet he only has ever said that to me and no one else. ever.

i'm scared!

2008-02-06T10:05:00.000-05:00

yesterday i was waiting for darkpony outside a subway station, and there were two volunteers for barack obama asking people if they've voted while handing out one-sheets with obama's talking points. well, a couple from out-of-town (i assumed by their clothing) walked by and the woman says to one of these guys, "i don't like muslims." the obama volunteer says back to her, "he's a christian," in which she replies, "no he's not (snort laugh)." ughs! omg, this is what people in america think. i'm really scared!

my new lamp!

2008-02-03T23:27:00.000-05:00

isn't it cute? and darkpony and i have already discussed that the acorn is kind of a bit...odd.

art appreciation

2008-02-03T23:09:00.001-05:00

here's some public art i've enjoyed recently...

this beauty is my favorite and can be viewed at the city cinemas 1, 2, & 3 on 59th street and 3rd avenue. i like going to movies there not only because of this great painting but also because they tell you to "turn off your pagers" before the movie starts. this cinema should get landmark status before this loveliness disappears.

and this stencil was attached to a construction site in my neighborhood. very nice!

one of these things is not like the others

2008-02-01T13:43:00.000-05:00

people.com reports that some hollywood heavyweights attended the democratic debate last night. ah yes, 3 oscar nominees/winners and...brandy.

are you having a laugh?

2008-01-31T14:10:00.000-05:00

you know how you are acquainted with someone, but the only thing you have in common is a joke. at the same time said joke is soooo played out, but the other person still holds on to it like life support though it's dead in the water? i thought so. me too.

what an egomaniac!

2008-01-31T12:12:00.001-05:00

for real, that rudy giuliani is nuts! did you see him on tv endorsing john mccain yesterday? he was saying that he was going to campaign with mccain in a bunch of states, and the look on mccain's face was one of complete horror. i swear! good, go ahead and do that, rudy. fine with me. i'm not a republican. and then the local news here in nyc is all like blowing hot air up rudy's butt by saying that his influence will be huge for mccain. what? how did rudy do in that florida primary? seriously, i think everyone's insane. oh i forgot how extraordinary of a mayor rudy was after the 9/11 attacks. so extraordinary that nyc was attacked on his (and george bush's) clock, and he did what any other person would have done in that situation by supporting the clean-up workers. wow! and don't even get me started that headline news includes arnold schwarzenegger announcing his endorsement for john mccain today. who cares! how about the governors of the other 49 states? who are they endorsing?

people who annoy me today

2008-01-31T11:48:00.000-05:00

and every day. subway door hogs! yes, i understand what a coveted spot that is, especially on a crowded train, but seriously, when people are trying to get on and off the train, move out of the freakin' way. moving your body kind-of-a-little-to-the-side does not cut the mustard. and you big man today, come on you're just too large to be hogging the door. oh and the addition of a puffy winter coat isn't helping anyone! blah. fyi, i've been in a mood this week.

okay, i admit it

2008-01-28T20:38:00.000-05:00

i might just be a tad bit obsessed with john travolta. for some reason this video of him at the sag awards the other night fascinates me, and i can't stop watching it because he is just so gosh darn creepy. if i were cate blanchett, i would be running scared. also, doesn't viggo mortenson look like a teeny tiny hobbit though he didn't even play one in the lotr movies? i just want to pinch him. mickey rooney!

addendum: what's with the guy next to john travolta with his hands covering his face? crazy video all around!

jealous much?

2008-01-28T16:18:00.001-05:00

i'm talking about myself. as usual. so "notes by naive" is definitely one of my most favorite blogs at the moment because its creator, tommy, has the best eye for all things: clothes, food, knick-knacks, design, books, etc. i can just imagine that her london apartment is super cozy yet always in perfect order. she also seems to possess a somewhat large clothing budget. she and i seem to have very similar sartorial tastes, but unfortunately, i'm lacking her budget. as i said to darkpony one time (in a funny voice which he told me to stop doing), "her wardrobe is to die for." case in point is her most recent post. i guess that i will live vicariously through her blog as i continue to shop at the salvation army and the goodwill. oh, sigh...

i have a confession to make...

2008-01-25T13:13:00.000-05:00

my blog is 14% lighter because i decided to delete all posts pertaining to those people i spend 8/5 with: ts, ft, b&b laugher, etc.

ts asked me what an "internet bully" was the other day, which made me realize that i'm one. i know! i'm totally lame. oh well. by the way, this has nothing to do with getting caught blogging about work by my work. i swear!

darkpony has strongly emphasized to me that nothing goes away on the internet, which i knew, but it did take an episode of touched by an angel to teach me that when you work in an office, the computers are on a network.

holy mother of god!

2008-01-25T12:57:00.000-05:00

can you tell which one is carrot top and which one is jackie stallone (sly's mama)? oh my!

my new, favorite website

2008-01-23T22:25:00.001-05:00

this is right up my alley!

darkpony's eustace tilley is the most awesomest!

2008-01-23T11:22:00.000-05:00

the new yorker is hosting a eustace tilley contest where the prize is pretty much nothing, but it has motivated darkpony to submit the above illustration. i think it's quite brilliant. you can check out other people's submissions here. no contest. am i right?

john travolta reacts to heath ledger's death!

2008-01-23T11:10:00.000-05:00

"I would give back all my awards to have him back."

huh? what awards? thetan levels 1-6? your razzies for battlefied earth?

ninjadove

2008-01-18T11:24:00.000-05:00

we are lacking a full-length mirror in our apartment, so i can only see from the hips down in one mirror and from the shoulders up in another. the bathroom at work has a full-length mirror, which made me utter this to myself today: "wtf are you wearing, hazeldove?!?" i seriously look like the most ridiculous ninja you've ever seen in your entire life. now i have to convince myself all day that if i saw some other girl wearing the same outfit, i bet i would think she looks real neat. it's not working...

spaz, spaz, spaz, spaz, spaz...

2008-01-17T14:50:00.000-05:00

guess what i did last night? i acidentally tossed a pork chop behind the stove. you know it! i was transferring some pork chops (yes, i cook!) from one pan to another, and whoops! i washed it off, and fed it to the unsuspecting darkpony. just kidding!

another classic hazeldove

2008-01-16T16:23:00.001-05:00

because i've got absolutely nothing else for you today. this gem was originally posted on january 29, 2006:

bed, bath, and beyond me
who are these people who are like, "i'm really in the mood for one of those mission style burritos from the bed, bath, and beyond cafe?"

a change is gonna come. perhaps.

2008-01-15T11:41:00.000-05:00

the other day i realized that darkpony has recently set-up two blogging websites for people, so they will have their own domain name and all that, which made wonder why i was still slaving away on blogger. i've proven for 2+ years now that i'm a somewhat steady blogger, and here he is setting up websites for people who have no track record at all. hmmph. so dp and i had a little discussion, and he's going to set-up a site just for me. ray! it may not happen for a month or two, but when it does, it's going to be so super awesome. i will also be debuting the striped shirts logo designed by dp. boo yah!

vintage hazeldove

2008-01-11T10:30:00.000-05:00

darkpony told me the other night that he was reading the "striped shirts" archives, and he said something like, "they are actually really funny; it's like you didn't write them." he clarified his statement, and it makes perfect sense to me, but i'm not going to bore you with the details here. so "striped shirts," formerly "striped shirts & skinny pants," has been around for 2+ years now. i thought it might be a good idea to share some of my favorite posts with you. first up is this gem from December 8, 2005:

oh, clementine
last night i was eating a clementine, and i kid you not, there were more than twenty seeds in it. i should have been paid to eat that clementine because it was a lot of work.

adults say the darndest things!

2008-01-09T14:43:00.000-05:00

darkpony and i were just discussing the ways some people respond in situations when you know you are 100% correct about the thing you are talking about, and you know they have maybe 7% of knowledge of the subject matter at hand:

you are PROBABLY right.

ACTUALLY, you are right.

i know i'm right, a-hole!

kids write the darndest things!

2008-01-09T13:20:00.000-05:00

i feel my blogging mojo waning at the moment, so i have to resort to what every television sitcom (brady bunch, who's the boss, cosby show, family ties, growing pains, etc.) has done in the past when out of ideas: kids!

my company does a holiday philanthropic thing where kids ask for specific books, and we buy them for them. here are some endearing quotes from the kids' thank you notes:

charlie and the chocolate factory: i like mike teevee the best because he watches television and has pistols.

charlie and the chocolate factory: it was in good shape. it had no ripped pages.

goosebumps: reading this is like watching tv.

general: your company is so great it should be famous!

ooops!

2008-01-08T16:16:00.000-05:00

today i had a physical and the doctor was like, "your bmi (body mass index) is a little high, so you need to lower that." then i'm all like to myself, "geez, i know hd (hazeldove) is no spring chicken and has put on some lbs (pounds), but hd can't be overweight!" then i stand up and the doctor is like, "how tall are you?" and i'm like, "5'7." then the doctor is all like, "oh, someone wrote down that you were 5'2 on your chart. your bmi is fine. ha ha." ha ha! hilarious!

something's a tad bit off here

2008-01-06T16:22:00.000-05:00

but i can't quite put my finger on it...wait...oh...OH! that woman's legs are part deer/part bionic prostheses! oh my!

why not much blogging happens from home, take 2

2008-01-06T15:02:00.001-05:00

why not much blogging happens from home

2008-01-06T14:23:00.001-05:00

brain teaser

2008-01-04T10:15:00.000-05:00

there's this cell phone ad at my subway stop which really makes me stop and ponder it every time i see it. darkpony and i have even discussed it! the ad shows a text message on a phone that says, "jen, it's 80s night. you won't even have to change." i find this text message to be a bit ambiguous, and i have come to the following two conclusions as to the meaning of said text message:

1. jen is already at an 80s themed party, so she's dressed perfectly for an 80s night out at the club.
2. jen's friend is a total bitch who thinks jen always dresses like she's stuck in the 1980s, and this text message is a dig at jen's wardrobe.

i'm going with #2.

let's get political, political, i want to get political...

2008-01-03T15:38:00.000-05:00

since the iowa caucus is today, i'm feeling quite political, so let's talk about ron paul. i really don't know much about this guy, but he seems to have quite the following of fanatical freakshows (check out that alliteration, heh?). why the harsh words? well, when you are on a two-hour flight from new york to chicago and some nutjob holds up a ron paul bumper sticker the entire flight, you have the right to assume that something is a little wack-a-doodle. am i right?

another trend i started

2008-01-03T13:42:00.000-05:00

harry potter! that's right. darkpony is making me purge all of my possessions, and in the process of doing this, i found my harry potter glasses circa 1997. now that harry potter is dead*, i can resurrect them. like jesus.

*i actually don't know if harry potter dies in the last book because i stopped reading the series at book #2.

boo hoo. not!

2008-01-03T13:31:00.001-05:00

this nyt article is the perfect reason why luxury condos should not be built on the williamsburg, greenpoint, and lic waterfronts. if you are lured by "the convenience" of water taxi service, then you are a fool. big time. now you have to ride the jmz with the plebes, suckas!

what a coincidence!

2008-01-02T15:26:00.000-05:00

i just read somewhere—probably the new yorker—that fergie's new year's resolution is to be less fergalicious. i find this to be funny because i'm also trying to be less fergalicious in 2008. it's going to be a hard road to travel, so keep your fingers crossed for me!

until then, the balcony is closed

2008-01-02T09:55:00.000-05:00

the other night darkpony, tomcat, and i went to the 10:35pm showing of there will be blood. oh right, my facebook friends probably already know this since fandango thinks it's okay to advertise this news to the world. anyway from previous experiences, i was dreading that we would get to the theater and have to wait in a chaotic line since the movie was completely sold out. fortunately, the loews cinema on the upper west side was very organized, and even if you got to the theater super early, you were allowed to enter and find seats. yeah! this made me very happy. unfortunately for me but fortunately for darkpony, i couldn't use this classic line i practiced the entire subway ride there: "there will be blood, if you try to cut this line." darn it. oh well.

i also couldn't stop saying "there will be blood" in a funny voice like i was a vampire or zombie (are these the same thing? darkpony?). that really drove darkpony crazy, but tomcat seemed to enjoy it.

best quote of the holiday

2008-01-01T13:29:00.001-05:00

i'm not going to get into the details here, but on christmas eve, my mother and i were at target, and i somehow fell down and injured myself in the store. for the record, i did NOT fall down due to my own clumsiness. here's my mother's response to the situation:

"we should file a claim, but we've got too much to do!"

thanks, mom.

i survived the holidays. barely.

2007-12-30T11:09:00.000-05:00

besides spending quality time with my completely normal and sane family, of course, here are a couple of highlights of my trip to the midwest, usa.

1. lily! that's a picture of her there. she's like a little doll you can carry around and cuddle. i love her.
2. royal crown cola! i didn't get a picture of this, but i think my hometown might be the only place in the united states, if not the world, with a rc cola vending machine.
3. rod stewart! mother was telling me there was a rod stewart impersonator around, and i was fortunate enough to see him with my very own eyes at the airport. he really looks like rod stewart. i am not kidding. i also enjoyed the subtle touch of the union jack sneaks. i heart you, rod!

extra! extra! read all about it!

2007-12-21T17:24:00.000-05:00

i'm famous! okay, not really, but working class cats got a shout out in the new york times metro section today in an article about the usefulness of bodega cats. actually, tomcat should be congratulated, as well as darkpony, for being the tyrannical overseer of his media empire. anyway, working class cats is racking up some major stats. we're talking close to 10,000 visitors. OMG! even striped shirts is getting some residual hits. ray!

gnomes!

2007-12-20T11:41:00.001-05:00

i really heart these little guys, and i hope that cubby a.k.a. my brother is getting me this family for christmas...hint hint. also, check out this webshop called reform school. that's where you can buy these gnomes, and the whole site has super cute stuff, though it may be too late to order in time for x-mas. i believe they also have a bricks-and-mortar store in silverlake in l.a. too cute to boot!

get a flickr account already

2007-12-20T11:03:00.000-05:00

good news for me and bad news for you, i finally bought a digital camera, thanks to old daddy-o, so there may be more pictures accompanying my posts, probably a lot of pictures of my cats. plus, it's my last day in the office, and i can't wait to get this holiday started right, to get this holiday started quickly. boo yah! tick tock tick tock...

it's not easy being a beatnik

2007-12-17T15:15:00.000-05:00

last year, i bought a black turtleneck sweater from the gap, which i'm wearing today, and i think it's part cotton/part flesh-eating cashmere. it's killing me. i swear!

why does your right arm hurt so badly, hazeldove?

2007-12-14T11:57:00.001-05:00

excellent question! well, a japanese restaurant on west 55th street didn't salt and shovel their part of the sidewalk, so i slowly fell down, like a crumpled piece of paper, and tried to break my fall with my right arm. then like the old biddy i am, i went into said restaurant and politely informed the proprietor that he needed to salt his sidewalk because i just took a nasty spill. his response to this was "happy holidays." thanks, jerkbutt.

lord arthur manticore, the most awesomest band you've never heard of

2007-12-13T12:08:00.001-05:00

last night we attended the fundraiser at barcade, which i previously blogged about, and they had a competition with the video game, rock band. so, we got our awesome band, lord arthur manticore, together: fab on drums, darkpony on bass, mtvshaw on guitar (playing at expert level, no less), and yours truly on vocals. we were nervous about our turn because fab and darkpony had never played those instruments in the game, but i was pretty confident that i could handle any vocals thrown at me. well, the organizers picked each band's song, and we got stuck with stone temple pilot's "vaseline". who's ever heard of that stupid song? not me! the song started and fab was doing her best keeping up with the beats, and darkpony and mtvshaw were doing their thing, and then, the lyrics started coming fast and furiously. i couldn't keep up because i had no idea how the stupid song went. fifteen long seconds later, it was all game over. we failed and were booed off what should have been a stage. the point of this story is that the stone temple pilots suck. big time.

get your boogie down!

2007-12-12T17:22:00.000-05:00

darkpony and mtvshaw just shared this al jareau video with me. the best part is the woman with the piece of cardboard fanning him to get his scarf to move!

darkpony, don't bother reading this post

2007-12-12T13:05:00.000-05:00

because it's about fashion, men's fashion. what do dudes think about thom browne and his shrunken suits? i know that my readership consists of a few-what is the word the kids are using today?-metrosexual! boys. i'm talking about you, jamie sabuda! anyway, i saw this guy on the e train from queens yesterday who was totally sporting a thom browne suit, and i was all like, "look at this guy trying to be thom browne. is it thom browne? must google thom browne." well, it was him! he was sitting down, and those short pants ride up pretty high. also, he wears little black socks with his oxfords in the winter. just curious!

this is what i like to hear!

2007-12-12T10:32:00.000-05:00

hey, new york city, let's keep this up!

feeling philanthropic?

2007-12-11T17:30:00.000-05:00

a friend of darkpony's is holding this fundraiser to buy toys for sick children (i'm not kidding!) tomorrow night (wednesday, december 12th) at barcade in williamsburg. you should come. i believe that there's a $10 donation, but you probably spent that much on a lame sandwich for lunch today. am i right?

soooo tired...

2007-12-11T17:10:00.000-05:00

i had to stay up until 1:20 am to make sure i didn't get sniped in an ebay auction. good thing i stayed awake because some you-know-what tried to snipe me. nah ah. those granny boots are mine. life is tough!

am i just spending a lot of time in c-town and duane reade

2007-12-11T12:17:00.000-05:00

or does wham's "last christmas" seem to be a really popular christmas song this year? here's the video, and when he says, "i gave you my heart," it really means, "i gave you my brooch." you'll see what i mean when you watch the awesome video. i'm going to definitely try to have a wham christmas this year!
also, this video was right under the wham one, so how can one not enjoy band aid's "do they know it's christmas time at all?" am i right? and hello paul weller (at 1:39 and 2:00 minutes)! i was too young to realize what a hottie you were! i also now understand why bono wears dark glasses 24/7. bananarama!

a total OMG!

2007-12-10T11:46:00.000-05:00

i just posted this to the working class cats blog. you MUST check it out!

tell me about it!

2007-12-08T11:49:00.001-05:00

OMG! i can so totally relate to this nyt real estate article. life is sooooo tough when you own a townhouse in the city. that is for sure! here's a snippet:

"They can be an island of calm in an agitating city. If only they came with doormen and supers, and didn’t have so many stairs." right?

guest blogging

2007-12-05T18:20:00.000-05:00

hey, i'm guest blogging over at tomcat's working class cats' website, and i just wrote my first post. check it out! meow!

the coup of 1992

2007-12-04T12:24:00.000-05:00

one of my bestest friends in the world, the hag, has just started her own blog about life in chicago and working in the miserable suburbs. check it out here! i look forward to more posts, so you go, girl!

i made this joke up. really!

2007-12-04T12:05:00.000-05:00

what do you call a crafty guerilla?

papier mache guevara!

remember this little ditty?

2007-12-03T17:13:00.000-05:00

i was recently re-introduced to this song. it's a pretty good one. maybe a little too poppy and overplayed on college radio in the early '90s but a good tune overall. unlike it's video...
warning: there is sound and video!

news to me!

2007-12-03T16:54:00.000-05:00

i was going to write this on the 4n publishing blog, but i like to keep that one nice, light, and positive. so at the small press book fair on saturday, there was this older man looking at all of our books, and i asked him if he was looking for a particular age. he told me that he liked blob's odd jobs but wasn't going to buy it because the kid wouldn't know what "ink" was since it's not around anymore (one of blob's odd jobs is as an ink pen refiller). hmmm. has anyone else heard about this conspiracy? no more ink? what the heck is in the pen on my desk then? i'm scared!

check out this art exhibit!

2007-11-29T10:49:00.000-05:00

our friend, jeff konigsberg, is part of this show, "i remember nothing", which is opening tonight. it looks like a good one. check it out!